My dearest beloved souls!
What a year it has been - and how wonderful to look back and reminisce, reflect, recollect all the memories made.
Without all of you without all these connections, it would not be as glorious as it has been for me. True there has been darkness of the mind and soul too. Though I came to treasure these times equally, if not as boisterously, to the times full of love and laughter. For the polarity of this reality, of our Earth, in the end is what enables us to experience the bright, exhilarating, ecstatic side of life. Additionally, how would be grow, how would we develop, if it was not for challenges, hardships, trials?!
As I browse through my monthly gratitude journal to bring back 2022 - for myself, this blog and my Vlog #24, I cannot believe my own life. I mean, yes, I lived through it all, I know I experienced all of it.
Still.
Not in my wildest dreams, never, would I have ever been able to imagine the person I have become, the precious people and animals that are in my life, the journey and adventures that lay behind now.
It is December 31st, the last day of the year.
I listen to my favourite podcast: Jay Shetty's 'On Purpose'.
And he lists questions that he posed to himself to reflect on the year gone and past. The questions apparently vary from year to year. This year's questions, for 2022, resonated with me and I wholeheartedly wanted to not randomly journal about my thoughts or go through the moments I felt most grateful for- I wanted to answer the questions he asked himself because they felt inspiring.
No filter, no limits to my answers.
Honesty and authenticity.
An attempt to bring together these hundreds of thousands of pieces that combined become my perception of my life and the world around me.
And so I did.
And I wanted to share them with you as well.
Not all of them, but three.
It may well be, you want to try them for yourselves, see what they do to you, if they move you, touch your heart and soul, spark different memories than the ones you already had in mind when thinking back on the year. They also have a deeper meaning, another layer if you so will. See, all of the questions act like an inner compass. Highlighting that which you also want to focus on in the new year.
Setting your mindset, consciously writing about the past, in doing so, forging your future.
Or so Jay Shetty says.
Here we go:
What was a challenge that you overcame this year?
Finances. Money security.
Well not really- money was just the superficial surfacing issue.
More precisely I experienced extreme anguish and anxiety, mingled with panic attacks and at times even suffocation.
The fear of failure. The fear of having my parent's worldview verified within my failed attempt to follow my own worldview. What to do if I cannot continue to travel? What if I was not able to become a freelancer, make my own money, start this new career, rely on myself?
What if I would not make it?
Through hardship comes ease.
Because of this very challenge, in the end, I was able to gain so much more than just the start of a new career and continuous income stream to fund my travels. As a result of the panic attacks and working with a coach (a dear friend of mine, Leslie: leslievitale@gmail.com ;if you ever feel like you want to work through issues that bother you.), I was able to realise firstly that money was not the issue, just the symptom, and secondly, that there is always more solution to a problem that we identify. For me the greatest fear was having to go home. Then I was able to open my heart and look at the abundance around me. And I saw, truly saw and felt, the love and care of all the people around me. People that appreciate me for who I am, opening their hearts and offering their homes if I was ever in any need of it.
With hardship comes ease.
I faced a core fear and looked at it, straight on worked through it, and out of that was born the most wonderful feeling of reassurance and abundance.
From lack to abundance.
Only one of many things this year. And an ongoing journey while still trying to get on both feet within this carrier path that I chose. Still, the most spectacular result lead me to see the bigger picture.
Thank you, all of you, for caring and loving me, for being there, for the reassurance that people are good, that the world is not a fearsome place if you leave your heart open to the possibility that you are good exactly the way you are.
Let people love you.
What is something that you bought this year that made you happy?
First and foremost the investment in my education to becoming a copywriter with the CCA (Comprehensive Copywriting Academy). Not because I am a full copywriter as I thought I would be. By all means, far from it. More because out of that online course I got the confidence to believe in myself. yes, the impostor syndrome is still there at times, but without the reassurance from the online community in the CCA Facebook group, without the connections, inspirations and ideas shared there, I would have probably spent an enormous amount of time, energy and mental challenges on doubting myself and getting my business nowhere. I learned to not back down, to not give up. Ways to approach clients in different manners and through different channels. I educated myself in marketing and grew my experience being self-employed and freelancing. It was scary, truly. Three monthly rates, an investment at a time when I only had the means to pay for the first rate, without any idea how to come up with the next two.
It worked out.
It always does, somehow, it seems.
Secondly - Switzerland. Both the people and Aarau. Having received the generous gift of two months rent for a studio apartment from my grandfather, this enabled me to fully focus on getting the freelance going. I had total freedom and enough time to get to work- and so I did. Every single day. Sending out pitch after pitch, call after call, working on mock-ups with other freelancers to show off my work and make connections, build a network, win client's trust. There were weeks when I did not know how I could afford veg for the next view meals, still I felt the happiest I have ever felt, regardless of the setbacks I encountered professionally. The people I surrounded myself with were honest, understanding, loving, caring, encouraging, inspiring. This summer healed my soul in many more ways. This summer ignited something that I thought was lost in the confused void of February.
Thank you to all you out there you know who you are, thank you so very much, with all my heart, from my heart to yours, love and light, always.
Thank you.
What was the best book or best podcast you listener to this year?
What inspired me was plenty. I would never be able to name all of it, or list all of it. You know I am a sucker for self-growth, thus how could I even remember all of the videos I consumed or podcasts I listened to that gave me hope and courage and instilled the strong sense of being able to believe in myself.
Yet when it comes to books, I became a great admirer of storytelling. The essence of the human soul. The bounty of culture, heritage, perceptions on life itself, is infinite. I increased my understanding for other cultures with 'Ueberbitten' by Deborah Feldman or 'Thirteen Moons' by Charles Frazier. I explored predictions about the future and what challenges, societal and philosophical, it might hold for us with the classic '1984' by George Orwell or 'Machines Like Me' by Ian McEwan. I dived into myths and tales of other countries with 'Ice Land' by Betsy Tobin, crossed over to other centuries with 'Pope Joan' by Donna Woolfolk Cross and merged into other worlds with 'Rise Of The Earthborn' by Emma C. Buenen.
All of this storytelling captures an essence of the fantasy that is a part of life and held some sort of benefit or wisdom for me.
And I am grateful for these artists to not doubt themselves and just write what formed inside their imagination for all of us to be part of.
As for podcasts: Jay Shetty's 'On Purpose' has been the calming insight on a number of subjects. Deepak Chopra's '21 Days Of Abundance Meditation Challenge' has given me three weeks of experiencing bliss and being pure flow of life. Additionally, as always, Teal Swan gives me opportunities to grow and reach my highest potential, for she always appears just when I need to make sense of something that has not yet made quite sense yet. I do take away from it what resonates with me, I leave what does not yet feel right for me. Having all of this available at any time of the day is miraculous. Thank you creators for speaking and not silencing your voice.
And for that I am grateful too.
This is it.
This was 2022.
If you feel like you want to answer some additional questions that I did not mention above, here are the other four questions Jay Shetty named:
What is a surprise that you felt with?
What are your blindspots for 2023? What made you happy this year?
A person you wouldn't have gotten through this year without?
With all my heart, beloved souls, thank you!
Thank you for watching over me, for supporting me, for being present in my life, for letting me play a part in your life.
Thank you for shining your light, for bringing love and compassion to those around you, for being kind always to yourselves and others.
For being on this Earth and giving the best you can.
I see you, I appreciate you and I love you.
Love and light,
Nadine
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